‘Twas the night before the historic 2026 midterm elections, what was to become a true Christmas in November.

Where was the president?

Giving a speech. At the Reflecting Pool. About the Reflecting Pool.

Not a parody account.

Anyhow, he stood beside Secretary of the Interior Doug Burgum who explained the president’s most curious preoccupation with renaming the reflecting pool after himself:

“The president’s a builder. You can’t keep him away.”

And it is true! The president is an incredible builder for the Democratic Party. No one has been as successful as he. Kansas. Texas. South Carolina. Iowa. North Carolina. Ohio. Maine.

It won’t be long until they call Mississippi. Mississippi! I’m not crying. Everyone is crying.

God Bless America.